So Very Dark

I’m feeling out of sorts today.

I’m having a less-than stellar week, artistically…I’m back at the grindstone with school projects and rather uninspired on any of my own–not that I really have that kind of time right now, but I want inspiration to be there anyway.  I did a little personal sketching on the plane before I got down to homework on the way to CA and, heck, it COULD have been the 3 hours of sleep talking but what came out was not what I wanted.  And also, speed-drawing…not my skill-set.  Wow.  Harder than I thought.

Today while on cruising the interweb I saw some awesome sketchbooks and had art envy:

I love the way these people use their sketchbooks…not only are they amazing artists that humble me, they aren’t restricted by the boundaries of the paper…they draw to the edges and over center seams.  They paint and color.  I think I used to use my sketchbooks much more loosely, but since I’m often working on something that I intend to later scan and color, I’ve gotten more used to working within the confines of the page, and making somewhat more finished pieces.  I usually just use one side of my book, as I work a lot in pencil and have yet to find a way to keep myself from smearing it.  And sometimes I’ll throw a little color down…after I have scanned and saved the original line art that I plan to work with later.

*sigh*

I suppose I’ve just been seeing a lot of amazing art around lately and have been in a bit of a lull period myself, and haven’t had time to work on the areas I feel deficient, or something so I am going through just a touch of self-loathing and fall is making me feel emo.  I just finished a sketch of Botticelli’s Birth of Venus for an Editorial Illustration project, and it pretty much looks like her…but seems…uninspired.  I’m also sick and feeling a little out of touch with school so far this quarter due to the disruption of my schedule in the first week, and I had hot chocolate and fell asleep on the couch and had weird dreams about living places we never lived and knowing people we never knew and embarking on a project I never had.  One of those strange naps that, after waking, has you questioning your own reality for a good while, and sometimes gives you moments of uncertainty for days to come.